Every day when I wake up in the morning, I think to myself, “What a great day. Am so thankful to be alive!” Then I begin my routine. But there are things that I always feel bad about.
Just imagine! I shave like after every two or three days. I feel bad about that. Its a constant reminder that I still have some shreds of testosterone in my body and that I need electrolysis. Electrolysis is the best way to get rid of them permanently. Sigh. Its not a nice thing. I shaved today. And it always makes me feel bad. But anyway, the time will come when I wont shave no more! I just need to plan it through. It simply doesn't feel right.
This is actually something I do almost all the time. I know my transgender, transsexual, transvestite, cross-dressers and drag queens know what I'm talking about. Making sure “that birth-defect” down there is properly tucked away into your pantie never ever to be seen or felt or even thought about. I just called it a birth-defect. I don't like it. I also don't hate it. But I don't like it. It makes me feel bad. Always. Huh!
I wear make-up mostly to conceal my heavily blemished and dark-shadowed face. I don't like it. Fine, it makes me look very nice and pretty but I just wish sometimes I could do without it. Granted this is not a regret of just me, many girls (not just trans) have the same predicament. They feel that they're naked without the make-up on. I feel the same. I don't like how my skin looks like without it. And I don't like the fact that I HAVE TO wear it every single day. Sigh.
Yeap. Thats my daily frustrations. But you know what? Things are good. I cant complain. Heck, I should be rejoicing! Honestly! I am so glad things are good. Most of all, I AM THANKFUL!